Monday, April 9, 2012

Beauty for Ashes...


Isaiah 61:3
"To all who mourn in Israel,
he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, 
a joyous blessing instead of mourning, 
festive praise instead of despair. 
In their righteousness, 
they will be like great oaks 
that the Lord has planted for his own glory."

On April 9, 2012 we lost our two precious babies

There are some events in our lives that leave us without words
And when the words finally come it feels as though they are unspeakable
Too fragile, too sacred, simply too much 
It has taken me months to put words to what my heart has been feeling 
Months for our world to stop spinning and for my feet to be still 
But words are important in times like these
Because words have life and life gives hope


Like so many that have gone before us
Miscarriage has now become a part of our family vocabulary
The ultrasound quickly confirmed our deepest fear
The place that once held so much life was now quiet 
Their small hearts had stopped beating and in many ways so had ours 


It has been family and dear friends that have carried us through 
Shared tears have included the blessing of acknowledgement
That these lives, though small, were real and worth being remembered
Just as we celebrated their beginning we will grieve their end together


In times like these many may question how we can trust God
We trust a God who is close to the brokenhearted - Psalm 34:18
We trust a God who has wept tears of his own - John 11:35
We trust a God who has overcome death - John 16:33
We trust a God who is our everlasting hope - Micah 7:7
We find refuge that the same God that knit our children together
Now forevers holds them in His arms...


Every good story has a beginning, middle, and an end
Though this story seemingly ended much too soon 
We are thankful that these words are forever written on our hearts
Now we look to a God of hope to continue weaving His narrative in our lives


We will always remember our precious little ones by name...
Charlotte Lydia Heiser 
Gabriel Lee Heiser


"Let the little children come to me, 
and do not hinder them, 
for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
Matthew 19:14

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Easter Sunday...

Easter Sunday...


Kevin and Mom

Mom and I 
Our Little Family...

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Limes...

11 Weeks...
11 Weeks
This week our babies are the size of limes!
I must admit that as they grow the magnitude of TWO continues to set in
I have been feeling more and more like myself and it has been a welcome change
My appetite was in full force and I couldn't seem to get enough food 

Jeremiah and I were able to head out to Billings for an overnight with his parents 
We had a great time celebrating my 28th birthday and Nancy's birthday as well
The time was filled with relaxation, fun shopping, and tons of great food 
We were thankful for time to get away with family and each other 

Our Little Limes
"Lord, thank you for your presence of peace this week in our lives and hearts"

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Green Olives...

So here is what we are learning so far as new parents
We are in control of nothing
And these tiny little creatures can easily foil any plans we have in life
Of course our new plans are even better than we could have asked for


Today we visited our new doctor and absolutely loved her
I found her easy to talk with, excited about our twins, and really took her time with us
We both left with a sense of peace and even greater joy regarding this process
We are thanking the Lord continually for the beauty that is becoming our family


We were able to learn some really great things about the twins this week
The twins are Dichorionic-Diamniotic according to the doctor
This means two placentas and two amniotic sacs have been formed
All fraternal twins start this way but also at least 1/3 of identical twins do as well
At our 20 week appointment we will find out the gender
This could help us further determine fraternal or identical 
As identical twins are 99% always the same sex
However even then the best way of knowing will be DNA testing after they are born 


According to our doctor Dichorionic-Diamniotic is the best way for twins to grow 
It poses the least risks for the babies as well as for myself
Chances are very good that I will be able to carry the babies to full term 
This is great news now but I am sure that will make for a very uncomfortable October :)


After measuring the babies and myself more our due date has also changed
We are now due on October 23rd...a week later than what we had anticipated
So according to the doctor I am 9 weeks along in my pregnancy instead of 10
The impatient part of me was hoping I would be further than expected 
But still thankful that they are growing...the size of two green olives to be exact!
Our next ultrasound and doctor's appointment will be in 4 weeks 
It was a great day and we left with so much to be excited for 


"Lord, thank you for the peace you gave me this week...you are our ultimate Creator"

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Prunes...

10 Weeks...
10 Weeks
This week our babies have grown to the size of two prunes
Prunes are not exactly the cutest fruit but we are thankful for their growth 
The news of twins is still settling in and we are getting more and more excited
Our next doctor's appointment will be this week
I am looking forward to asking questions and finding out more about our twins

This week we had to break down and contact the OnCall Doctor for questions
After several days of extreme and violent vomiting I found myself dizzy and in pain 
Thankfully the doctor offered some relief in the form of a mild medication 
At this point, with twins, our biggest danger is malnutrition for the babies and myself
The medication helped me keep food down and feel more like my old self 
We are thankful for the care we are under in order to keep our babies healthy

"Father, continue to grow and shape our children in Your image"

Saturday, March 10, 2012

TWINS...

  9 weeks:
9 Weeks
The big news this week is that we are having TWINS!!!
I must admit that this changes everything, as you can imagine
I have no idea what is going on inside my body and have many many questions 
This week will be spent researching and reading new information about multiples
We have enjoyed sharing the news with family and friends
And the reactions have been priceless!
Though still very very sick this week, I must admit the adrenaline has helped me 
From the looks of things this tiny blog and our little family are going to change fast...                          
Two times the laughs...
And two times the love!


Friday, March 9, 2012

A Double Blessing...

I had been looking forward to this day for weeks
The day that we would be able to hear our little one's heart beat
I was aware of changes going on inside me
And yet I knew hearing the heartbeat would make it even more real 
It was a reminder that we had been blessed with life
And this little life was growing

Jeremiah and I headed to the office and in for our ultrasound
Today we were visiting JoAnne Robbins, a midwife at the hospital 
She delivered one of our dear friend's baby and came highly recommended
Part of determining our best birth plan was visiting JoAnne as well as the birth center

As we sat there I was relieved to hear a strong steady heartbeat
The ultrasound tech let us know "Yup, one strong heartbeat"
Jokingly I said, "At least it is only one!"
Little did I know what was about to happen...
In that moment the tech paused and began to look even closer at the screen 
"Wait just a minute..." she said
I felt my heart drop out of fear that something was wrong with the baby
They began to look even closer at our baby and revealed...
It was not only one baby but TWO babies....TWINS
Jeremiah and I looked at each other in disbelief and promptly began to cry
I have never been so excited and terrified all in one moment
The ultrasound showed two beautiful and healthy babies 
Each baby had a strong and steady heartbeat 
We could even see them flicker on the screen
In an instance our entire lives changed...isn't that just like children?

Heiser TWINS
The entire office celebrated the big news with us from the receptionist to the nurses 
My head was reeling but things started to make sense now
I had been so terribly sick and tired since I found out I was pregnant
"Double" symptoms are characteristic of twins and would explain my symptoms
We were immediately referred out of a midwifes care and on to a high risk doctor
This will be one of the first of many changes we experience in our "plan" for baby
The doctor referred to this as "spontaneous twins"
There is no relevant family history or use of medical treatments to warrant the twins
We are simply calling it a "miracle"

We are in shock
We are in awe
And we are falling doubly in love with our growing family...

"Lord, your ways are higher than our ways and we trust you with this new joy"

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Raspberry...

8 Weeks:
8 Weeks
Our little raspberry, the baby's size this week, hit a huge growth spurt 
At least that is what I am thinking considering the huge change in how I felt this week 
Previously my days were marked tiredness and naps throughout the day
This week I had tons more energy (yay!) and I was thankful for it
Considering I have never been so nauseous in my whole life
Morning sickness hit and hit hard this week
Even causing me to miss several days of work 
Apparently its hard to have a session with your therapist if they keep leaving to be sick 
The kids I work with don't know I am pregnant yet and we will wait to tell them 
But they have all noticed how many saltines I eat now at work 
And some have even been requesting crackers for their snacks...haha :)

We filled our cupboards with saltines, gingerale, lemons, peppermints, etc...
Basically I tried any and every home remedy that was offered to me
The winner of the week ended up being...Cheerios!
This made me smile because its the only thing that calmed my mom's stomach with me 
We are thankful this week is over and thankful that nausea means our baby is growing


Another big change this week was that I slipped into maternity pants
Although I am not really "showing" yet I have begun to feel really uncomfortable
I found that if my pants were tight I felt even more nauseous
My mom had sent a giftcard for the GAP, my favorite store, to buy some things
I was so excited when my new pants arrived in the mail and fit great
The pants are really comfortable and yet look just as cute as my regular pants
I'll be picking up several things online over the next few months I am sure 

"Lord, I depend on you for the very strength to get me through the day"

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Blueberry...

7 weeks:
7 weeks
Our baby is the size of a blueberry this week!
As our baby works overtime to grow bigger and bigger
I am feeling the process slow me down more and more
Much of the same this week in terms of exhaustion
I attempted to grocery shop but had to take a nap
I attempted to start laundry but had to take a nap
I attempted to do anything on my ToDo list but had to take a nap
Mommy gets the message loud and clear Baby Heiser... "Slow Down"

Since we live so close to my work, I continue to walk to school each day
And I have been walking at least an additional thirty minutes after school
This has helped give me a small burst of energy to make it through the afternoon
I am thankful for a mild winter so I can keep getting the fresh air in Montana

Many fears and worries crept into my heart and mind this week 
Jeremiah continues to be a constant place of stability for me
And I love the calm spirit in which he has approached our pregnancy
The Lord knew the exact balance we would need during this season of life

"Lord, may I find my complete rest in You throughout this pregnancy" 

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Baby's First Photo...

The positive tests are there
The symptoms are creeping up more and more
And yet the news of our baby is still sinking in
That is until today that is...
Because today we saw our baby for the first time!
According to the midwife we are healthy and on track for our little one

6 Week Ultrasound
Today Jeremiah and I toured the Great Falls Birthing Center
We are currently researching this facility as an option for giving birth to our child 
I was impressed with the professionalism and caring nature of our midwife
We are excited about exploring alternative birthing options for our family 
We continue to pray for a safe and healthy arrival for our little one

Excited New Parents

"Heavenly Father, we continue to seek you every step of the way on this path"

Flowers from afar...

The love for our new arrival just keeps coming
And today it arrived at our doorstep in the form of beautiful flowers
These bright blooms were sent with love from Larry and Nancy
And we are thankful for the joy in which they have celebrated with us
I am excited for the day some of Nancy's beautiful sewing projects arrive!

"Lord, thank you for the way this blessing brings us all together"

From Larry and Nancy

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Sweet Pea...

6 weeks:
6 weeks
How much our lives have changed in the few days we have known our big news
This week was filled with more excitement as we learn more and more about our baby
This week our baby is the size of a sweet pea and growing each minute 


My week was filled with naps, snoozes, and exaggerated blinking
No matter how you say it...I was tired
Throw in a few mood swings and hardly any energy for housework
And Jeremiah officially wins husband of the week award!


Our big treat out this week was Oreo Sonic Blast desserts
We may or may not become regulars over the next nine months


"Lord, your creation amazes us and we are thankful for how You are working"

Go Wildcats!

College seems like years and years ago...
And years ago I was hardly imaging where my life would be today
I was concerned about McConn Coffee drinks and making it to RA meetings
Hardly the same thoughts that this New Mom has today
But years ago my Mom knew this day would come and she wanted to be prepared
So at some point while I was giggling with roommates and playing pranks
My Mom was carefully selecting a tiny outfit for a future WildCat

GO Wildcats!
GO IWU!

You are loved...

There has never been a doubt in my mind that I was loved
Whether it in words, actions, or thoughts
My family has communicated love to me my whole life
And now our sweet baby is sharing in that same blessing
Baby Heiser....you were loved before we even knew about you
There are many across the country who are rejoicing over you already
Thank you Grandma and Grandpa Lohr for our first official gift of love
Baby's First Gifts
"Lord, thank you for family and the gift they will be to our little one..."

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Questions, questions, questions...

There are SO many questions associated with a first time pregnancy 


"What is going on inside my body?"


"What should I eat?"


"Is this normal?" (about basically every ache and pain I feel)


Jeremiah and I have loaded up on some great books
To hopefully ease some of our questions and therefore concerns
I have loved watching him curl up every night with his new book 

New Books

"Lord, take our anxious thoughts and allow us to submit them to your perfect plan"

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Our Little Valentine...

Happy Valentine's Day 
We can't wait for our little bundle of love arriving in October 2012
Well worth the wait...

5 weeks:

5 weeks

2 more positive pregnancy tests (in case you can't tell this hasn't sunk in yet)

3 medical appointment made
We will be deciding between a birthing center, midwife at the hospital, or a doctor
Our first appointment will be 2/23 and we are excited to start asking questions

I have been craving salty and spicy foods and have not liked sweet things (?!?!)
However I got sick twice this week from Mexican food-ugh!
Gingerale and crackers were my best friends those nights

Overall I have been suffering from complete and total exhaustion rather than nausea
Jeremiah has been great and helping out around the house 
Since my new bed time seems to be around 8:00pm

"Be still and know that I am God..." Psalm 46:10

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Becoming a Father...

Love, Jeremiah


And so it begins...

February 11, 2012
6:00am


3 positive pregnancy tests
And the news sinks in...I am pregnant!


Jeremiah was still asleep on this Saturday morning
And yet there was no way I was going to be heading back to sleep
I got dressed and quietly slipped out to Target for breakfast food
I told Jeremiah I was picking up Rhode's Cinnamon Rolls
A special treat we both love when we celebrate something exciting
Looking back he thought it was strange I was going out so early
I walked aimlessly around Target looking for something for the "new daddy"
I may or may not have cried several times while shopping (hormones?!?!)
The magnitude of the day just kept sinking deeper and deeper in 
After not being able to find anything that said "daddy" and therefore crying more
I finally settled on a card and sweet baby duck toy
Now it was time to share the big news...


Jeremiah was awake when I got home and little did he know what was coming next
I sat him down to open up the present and he thought the duck "was cute"
Nope, he was not connecting the dots very quickly but the card truly gave it away
"Today we start our biggest adventure...parenthood"
It was a beautiful mix of excitement, fear, and surprise on his face
I have never loved him more than in that moment, as the father of our child 


Jeremiah's Present


It didn't take us more than a few minutes and we were calling family and friends
The idea of keeping the news to ourselves never really crossed my mind



 
 From the Farris Family
I couldn't possibly keep this level of excitement to myself!


From Jeremiah
From My Mom and Kevin

The day was filled with love for us and the new baby from so many that we care about
We are now a family...and the next nine months are going to be an adventure!


"Lord, thank you for the gift of our precious child...."